Surviving Sleep Deprivation Before Sleep Training

The first week home with your baby is a daze. You’re still a bit out of it and the sleep deprivation sucks but you aren’t crying uncontrollably yet. Then comes day 7 (or thereabouts), your hormones crash back down to reality from your pregnancy highs and you are in the torture stage of sleep deprivation. I have used sleep training no later than 13 weeks with each of my kids, but regardless of when you start, there is some amount of no-sleep craziness before you get there. These are my top tips for getting through it.

1. If you are doing this with a partner or have help, work in shifts. You need a 5-hour stretch of sleep, preferably in the evening hours. Sometimes the prenatal classes say 3 hours, I’ve been there a few times and trust me, it’s 5. My husband naturally stays up later than I do. So I pump what I can to leave for the baby, supplement with formula and I go to sleep at 5pm. My husband stays up with the kids until about 10 and brings the baby in to sleep when he comes to bed. In this situation, even if the baby wakes up as soon as they enter the room, I have my 5 hours. sometimes, I get up to 7. If you are not doing this right now, this will change your life.
2. If you have parental leave, take it… both of you! Some new parents, and veterans who should know better, have the option of parental leave, and don’t take it. You will both be sleep deprived. The birth parent will be recovering from labor, possibly surgery, possibly both and the non-birth partner will need to pick up the slack. Yes, your bonus will be impacted and yes maybe your raise as well, but having that time off before you train your baby to sleep through the night is priceless.
3. Can you save up five thousand bucks? Hire a Postpartum doula or a pediatric nurse. These folks know how to care for the birth parent and the baby. You can hire this person to care for your baby in your home for 8-hour night shifts so you both can get some sleep. This is very expensive, but if you have the means, this is the best thing you can do for yourself.
4. Can you save up 600 bucks? Rent a Snoo. I had varied results between my three kids with the Snoo. In the case of my first, he slept just a few minutes longer each night for a week, then he slept for eight hours straight, at 4 weeks of age. My second and third, no such luck. But the Snoo was still worth it in giving me the opportunity to not rush in every time they made a sound in those early days. To give them five minutes to cry before they fell back to sleep on their own. It gave me just a little extra peace, and it was worth it.
5. Put Sleep Training on the Calendar This is your light at the end of the tunnel. When you do this, your babe will sleep during the night and so will you. knowing that there is an end to the madness of getting up every 90 minutes around the clock can be a lifesaver. For my routine and must have buys, refer to my Sleep Training Post.
6. Postpartum Depression and Anxiety are a thing. Becoming a parent hits ya like a ton of bricks. Every woman I know had some amount of crying, feeling anxious and a maybe little depressed. But in some cases, as was the case with me, these symptoms are pervading and debilitating. The telltale signs for me are zero appetite (i mean if you eat 1 bite of mashed potatoes in a day you are on the verge of vomiting, its extreme) and inability to sleep especially at night. In this situation, you may need additional support. Talk to your doctor and do a little research before the baby comes and have a psychiatrist and psychologist in mind should you need it. Your OB can refer you, they can often prescribe a small dose of medication to last you until you can get in to a doctor for evaluation and there are support groups that you and your baby can attend. In the Seattle Area, The Swedish Center for Perinatal Bonding is a great resource.

Next week the woman who inspired it all, my favorite Physical Therapist Sarah Spivey, guest stars with her top tips for childbirth and c-section recovery.